Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Something is not right

I think that something has gone terribly wrong with our garbage can. It actually smells like something crawled in it and died.

Corey is usually the one that takes care of the garbage duties. When we first got garbage service we ordered a small can thinking that we were superior for producing less waste. But, holy crapazoid, our family can produce the garbage. However, since we refused to admit defeat we still felt like we could manage to cram it all into one small can.

So, every Tuesday, Corey climbs onto the large pile of Mt. Garbage and jumps up and down until it all fits. That, in itself, is a fun event to behold. Corey, work boots on and all, hanging onto the pull-up bar mounted on the garage wall for support, all the while jumping up and down like a Mexican jumping bean. Almost makes you want to pull up a chair and grab some popcorn.


This week the garbage duties became mine which I promptly unloaded on my son. I'm not sure if Michael had the same style and flair as Corey while stomping down the garb, I choose not to watch. I thought it might hurt his fragile ego if I laughed But, because I was out getting the mail anyway like the good little soldier that I am, I brought the can back to the garage after the dump truck came.

Unfortunately, I happened to be down wind of the can while wheeling it on it's merry little way. And, hol.e.crap, the stench was so bad that I looked around expecting to see a dead animal nearby.

It was then that I realized that the smell was coming from the can. I risked permanent nose damage peered over the side of the can and observed the most disgusting layer of trash, firmly compacted and wedged to the bottom of the can. No amount of swearing shaking by the little mechanical arm thingie on the dump truck is going to dislodge what I saw.

The smell was so intense that I couldn't even put the can into the garage. I had to demote it to a place outside.

So, now the question is, what in the bloody sam hill do I do? There is no possible way without being medicated first that I am tackling the can. My nose is already waving the white flag just thinking about it. I can't make one of my kids clean it out. although I thought about it

Would it be poor form to cancel my garbage service and have them collect their bin of death can? Then, I could resign up for service and they would deliver me a bright shiny new, non-smelly can!

So the question is: Is that sneaky....or desperate brilliant?


rachel said...


Good luck with that and for sure let us know what you end up doing. Or should I say, what COREY ends up doing. ;)

Ginger said...

I don't think you should cancel the service, but gentle back over the old beast and then call to request a new can. That way, somebody else won't be subjected to the "Can-O-Death" that currently resides at your address. While your at it, you might want to think about upsizing the can. (Unless Corey counts tramping trash as his exercise!)